Behind Every Criticism is a Wish
On Criticism as an Unstated Wish, A modern day extension of Kipling's poem "If -", Nothingness as Potential, Reading Recommendation and What I'm Doing
Welcome to the eight edition of the ‘Read. Learn. Enjoy.’ letter.
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Behind Every Criticism is a Wish
A postcard on Criticism as an Unstated Wish.
Constant criticism can be troublesome in any relationship.
Esther Perel recommends that in this situation, we need to pause and reflect to understand the unstated ‘wish’ behind the criticism.
What’s important to understand about criticism is that it sits on top of a mountain of disappointments of unmet needs and unfulfilled longings.
Criticism as a way of asking for something will often produce the opposite result of what the person criticizing wanted: to be loved and to feel good about themselves.
What’s the right approach in this situation?
Esther recommends a 3-step process to address the criticism (or low-intensity conflicts or bickering) in any relationship.
Pay attention to what’s working
Let yourself be vulnerable
Reflect and take responsibility
These are relevant in personal relationships as well as other relationships, like those at the workplace.
IF -
A modern day extension of Rudyard Kipling’s famous poem “If -” by yours truly.
Rudyard Kipling wrote his famous poem “If -” a 125 years ago in 1895 and it is considered to be a literary example of Victorian-era stoicism.
Within Nothingness There is Infinite Potential
A postcard on Nothingness as Potential.
Shunmyo Masuno explains this in his book Zen: The Art of Simple Living.
It means that human beings are born possessing nothing. Yet within all of us lies infinite potential.
The greatest achievement was at first and for a time a dream.
The oak sleeps in the acorn;
the bird waits in the egg.
A seed waits for the right environment to grow into a plant. Similarly, each of us has potential that is waiting for the right environment to grow and prosper.
The waiting is not passive-waiting for something to happen.
The waiting needs to be active-waiting, by putting yourself, through your actions, in a place where you let opportunities find you.
Reading Recommendation
Reminiscences of a Stock Operator by Edwin Lefèvre
This book, published in 1923, is roman à clef by American author Edwin Lefèvre. It is a thinly disguised biography of trader and stock market operator Jesse Livermore. The book follows his journey from the age of 15 when he made his first $1,000 to becoming a Wall Street legend.
(roman à clef = a novel in which real people or events appear with invented names.)
A few interesting takeaways from the book.
On Solving Problems
Before I can solve a problem I must state it to myself.
On Exiting a Trade (or anything else).
When you want to get out, get out.
On Skin in the Game
You can’t tell till you bet.
Trading advice to Traders out there
Always sell what shows you a loss and keep what shows you a profit.
You can read my summary of the book here.
Most Read
The most read essays and book summaries in the month of August on my blog were.
Essays:
On Children by Kahlil Gibran – My interpretation of the meaning of Kahlil Gibran’s beautiful poem On Children from his book The Prophet.
Energy is the Currency of the Universe – An essay on the fact that your energy and attention creates your reality.
Via Negativa – When Less is More – An essay on how you can achieve more by doing less!
Book Summaries:
Freedom from the Known by J Krishnamurti – A book about freeing yourself from the past and the known.
The Art of the Good Life by Rolf Dobelli – A book outlines 50+ mental models or a toolkit to answer the age old question ‘what it means to live a good life.’
The Zurich Axioms by Max Gunther – A book that challenges conventional wisdom about investing, money and risk.
More being added every month.
What I’m Doing
What I’m doing now and what’s coming up next.
NOW
Reading 📖
Coffee Can Investing by Saurabh Mukherjea
A book about a successful ‘Coffee Can Investing’ strategy adapted for Indian markets.
“Coffee Can Investing Portfolio” is a term coined by Robert G. Kirby when he found an investor, who had a portfolio of the same stocks that Robert had recommended and bought, out-performed Robert’s own portfolio. The difference was the investor adopted a ‘buy-and-forget’ strategy, while Robert used an active ‘buy-and-sell’ strategy.
The concept has its roots in American Wild West where people used to hide their valuables in the coffee cans and then the cans were put under a mattress to be kept for years or even decades.
Thinking 🤔
‘Risk comes from not knowing what you are doing.’
Warren Buffett
Writing ✍️
In addition to this edition of the letter:
Added two new book summaries:
NEXT
A hint of what’s coming up in the next few editions.
Book Summary of Charting and Technical Analysis by Fred McAllen.
Book Summary of Coffee Can Investing by Saurabh Mukherjea.
Thank you for reading till the end!
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Until next week,
- Satyajit
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